Getting Sit Past the Radar!
by Hitamukiissekiwa
Summary: Technically from a modern day 'toon-actor-'verse AU, but basically: Inuyasha and Kagome explore the kinkier side of their relationship. Inuyasha hasn't been getting the most out of it, but together he and she go about trying to fix that. All the while being scouted for a series by famous manga artist and 'toon photographer Rumiko Takahashi and soon Studio Sunrise.


**いぬやしゃ** **オーシッたい**

 **犬夜叉 大失態**

( **流れに身を任せる** **, OK?)**

The moon was shining down through a clear night sky above Tokyo. High atop an apartment floor in the Katouun District stood a young 'toon woman with brown eyes, long iconic jaggy black hair down her back, dressed in white-and-green-with-red-bow-seifuku and traditional white kneesocks. She was inches from a wide open window, pausing quietly with a bow of her head and a barely audible tiny sigh before making a vocalized leap — away from it, down off the couch and solidly onto the spine of a young 'toon male with even more iconic yellow eyes, long white hair, wearing an off-white hadajuban and bright red nu-bakama.

Raising her foot, she thumped it down audibly on his head, leaning all her weight on it, pressing his face firmly into the modest carpet — at which he grunted and flinched — rocking back and forth a bit before immediately stopping and letting her arms drop, back in a slight hunch.

"How's that?"

Lifting his head with a light groan and a sigh, he replied "It's not working."

Eyes closing for a moment, she mimicked it — until his ear twitched against her instep, sending her into a backward flying fleep toward the other end of the couch, landing with a light thump. "Eeyaah!"

When he didn't move, she paused, lids lowering lightly with an extended "…aaah~…aa~aa~aah~" as she inched her leg closer with a wiggle of her foot.

"Sheesh…" he uttered, pushing himself up and grinning as he lunged, sliding an arm around her as he playfully wiggled claws at her waistline. "Tickletickletickletickletickle!"

"Aaaah! AaaHAha!" she giggled, lightly rocking in his grip, with a thick 'toonish flinch and a wide open grin likewise. When he stopped, she lifted her head slightly, almost snapping "Hey! Nobody told you to stop!"

With a twitch and an "Oh," he resumed, putting on another light, content smile as he raked and squeezed his fingers more synchronously from her hips to her underarms, grazing her stomach in circles before snagging her ankles in the crook of his elbow. "Tickletickle! You like it~ You liiike it~ Tickly little Kagome!"

"HahaHA! AaaAaahahaha!" Eyes popping open wide, she squealed "Okay, for real, stoppit!" with a flail. Again, he withdrew, even chuckling. Then with an aside glance, she added "Er…actually…forget it — don't stop, don't stop!"

"JEEZ, you're such a weirdo!" Inuyasha said, picking himself up only to immediately slump back down on the couch. Kagome frowned.

"Sorry," she said, simpering lightly as she sat up, before following suit "I feel bad _…_ it's easier for me but it's not easy for you…"

"Keh. It's fine. It's always been like this…" Gaze hazing as he stared at the floor, he chuckle-snorted, adding "I've always been a total weirdo."

"Hang on a sec!" the girl chided, sliding up beside him with a practiced flair — pausing to gaze down thoughtfully as well before going on "I'm a total weirdo, too. I admit it! But…but — no, no, regardless, everyone's kind of a weirdo. It's like the humans say: it can't be helped."

"You're human!" the white-haired one shot back though he smiled.

"Then you should really take what I'm saying to heart, right?" the black-haired one said likewise, lightly wagging a finger.

"Maybe."

Leaning back and half-consciously snuggling with a pillow, Kagome said "Mm. Anyway, what's on TV?"

Grabbing the remote and clicking it on with his thumbs, Inuyasha glanced at her. "No idea — let's see…"

A yellow-eyed light pink-and-white-furred cat of a distinctly non-Pacific Island breed crawled down a dimly-lit, dirty-looking street. She paused every so often, the camera switching to lingering closeup shots, her weary eyes darting. Then a voiceover began.

"What's this?" the girl reiterated, brow raised. "Looks old..."

"Dunno," the white-haired one echoed, head slightly tilted.

"This is Lulu. She's starving, and cold, and tired. But she can't sleep. She could be killed at any moment. Humans might kill her on a whim. Dip is completely legal to own here… there are puddles of it in the street. Poor Lulu might even die tonight…"

In 'toonish unison, the two drew back in a balk with wide flung arms and sweatdrops, proclaiming "THIS stupid commercial!"

Sure enough, along with the crackle and waver of an infomercial aired before the turn of the millennium, the famous blue doe-eyed pompadour-sporting ambassador to the West appeared, crouching to scoop up the cat in his arms, cradling her, though she still shivered with sad, tired eyes.

"She desperately needs a sponsor, the phone number is 0120-610-9834. Any and all donations are greatly appreciated!"

Lids and brows lowered, Inuyasha put a hand to his mouth and quipped "If you love America so much, go live there! IDIOT!"

"Actually…I think he did," Kagome said, eyes ceiling-ward, finger to her lip.

The white-haired one blinked, again directing his gaze and words at the TV. "Oh. Nevermind!"

Suddenly, a much newer advertisement flashed across the screen. "Have you ever thought about dabbling in the magic and the mystical? Witchcraft, magic items, white magic, black magic, all kinds of magic!"

"Ohh…" the couch-bound pair uttered together again.

"Interesting," the girl mused.

"Maybe," Inuyasha said again, letting his jaw slide into his hand as he continued to watch.

"Truly special magic items to spice up your romantic life!"

"Ohh!" the two muttered again — before the white-haired one facepalmed, eyes ceiling-ward as he noted "Damn, now I sound like that Mifune idiot!"

In spite of everything, Kagome laughed, patting him on the shoulder. Glancing at the screen again, she noted "Look — it's not far from here. You wanna go check it out tomorrow?"

"Mm…OK. If you really want to," he said with a shrug.

"Mm. I think it'll help."

"Yeah, me too!"

Both yawning in turn, they slowly slumped up against one another, lids drooping closed, arms loosely around one another.

"Good…"

"…night…"

"Hey, I think this is it!" the girl noted, pointing at one of the consecutive shop doors along the street. "Whoa… Mister Nahanom's New Mystical Magical Novelties."

The white-haired one threw her a glance with a typical snort. "What kind of a weird mouthful of a name is that, anyway?"

"Let's just go inside," she said, taking him by the wrist — though he took it back in the doorway with a pause, then followed her in.

"Welcome, welcome!" bid the apparent 'toon shop owner, stepping out from behind the counter to give them a personal bow. "I'm so glad you've come!"

Immediately, Inuyasha donned a smirk, opening his mouth — only to get a sharp but tired glare from Kagome. "Don't even think about it…"

With another huff, the white-haired one turned away, arms folded, muttering "FINE. It was a stupid easy joke anyway."

"Sooo…! What is it that you two have come seeking?" Nahanom asked, a hair dramatically, as he whisked back to his front counter. "You've come together, and I can tell you're very close, so do I gather that you're looking for more…personal items?"

Kagome and Inuyasha shared a glance, the latter saying "Well, yeah, actually!"

"Ah, love!" the man mused, "Well, we do have QUITE a large selection of…items with more tantalizing effects…!" He waved an arm toward a particular row of tall, full wooden shelves. "What kind of excitement are you looking for, Miss?"

"Well, uh…u-uhh…" the black-haired girl stammered, glancing around. The store wasn't crowded, but there were a few others browsing aisles and tables. Finally, she said "I – I'm not REALLY comfortable saying that kinda stuff out in public like this. Sorry."

The white-haired one gave an eye-rolling sigh. Nahanom, however, only nodded. Flipping an overhead switch, the pair twitched with a small exclamation as a blueish-white light seem to cast down on them — but also encasing them not-too-tightly back-to-back within a sizeable mostly-clear barrier. Giving it a curious prod, Kagome found that it yielded fairly easily; it looked like a stretched soap bubble, it felt like modeling clay.

In his own slightly smaller projected barrier, the shop owner explained "This is called the Cone of Silence. Specially made in America. I assure you, you'll be able to hear me, and I'll be able to hear you — but absolutely no one else will hear a thing."

"Oh…by those poor abused 'toons…" Kagome said in quiet whisper to herself, brows convex over lowered lids.

To test this, Inuyasha spied another young girl passing by — who looked up as she noticed him don an almost sleazy grin, pointing and looked as if he was talking. Kagome immediately looked about as visibly, 'toonishly distressed as it was possible to be.

They watched the girl only give them a raised brow before continuing off and disappearing behind one of the near shelves.

The black-haired girl slowly relaxed, eyes still wide. "It works…it really works!"

"Wow, maybe I should get one of these things," the white-haired one said quietly. Though not quietly enough as Kagome tugged on his ear.

"No."

"See? I told you!" Nahanom noted. "Of course I'd want to protect the privacy of my customers."

"Okay, well, in that case…then…I really, REALLY love being tickled!" Kagome said, hands to her still reddish cheeks. She glanced at Inuyasha. "…and sometimes returning the favor." She poked his side, and the white-haired one gave chuckling snort.

Nahanom grinned genuinely. "Ohhh, a tickle-lover, hmm? Well, we have everything from small jewels to hide on your person that will fill your whole body with a tingling sensation from head to toe at a touch. Or if you like, we have ancient artifacts — that can spring with up to a hundred limbs that can hold you any way you like, while still being tickled senseless…"

The girl wiggled a bit, eyes shut, uttering a quiet squeal as she let her imagination run wild at the descriptions.

Suddenly, Inuyasha pierced her reverie with a "HEY! We're here for ME, not you! Aren't we?"

"Oh. Yeah — yeah, right, sorry," the black-haired girl said quietly with a simper, gaze falling for a moment. "Go ahead."

"Thanks," the white-haired one said, turning to face the shop owner. "Anyway, I, uh…I'm more of a…heck, I guess crushing —" he half-wittingly held flat palms parallel, bringing them closer "— maybe trample-ish kind of guy, y'know?" Regardless of the proven privacy, he immediately looked away, arms folded once more. "But I've never really been able to find anything that really did it for me. We've tried chairs and couches and and statues and stuff…but nothing worked."

"I even tried jumping on him," Kagome said with a subtle twist at the waist, hands clasped in front of her, glancing down.

Inuyasha chuckled, noting "Yeah! And after a few minutes, I was like 'Did a bird fly in the window?'"

The girl shook her head though she smiled.

"Hmmm…mm…" the shop keeper mused, rubbing his chin and his small goatee, "Let's see…I feel like I remember one particular item that might work. I'll have to look again…" He trailed off, walking away from the counter again — the cones vanishing, though fortunately the shop was momentarily empty — toward the nearest shelf facing them.

Stepping up a small stepladder, he rummaged through the items on the top shelf, then the one below it. Finally in the middle of one of the lower shelves, he uttered a typical "Aha! Found it! Here, see what you think…"

The white-haired one took the ring of beads. Most of them were round and a deep shade of purple, with a handful of pointed ivory ones. He turned it over, clacking the beads against one another in his hand. "So what DOES this thing do, anyway?"

"I could tell you," Nahanom replied, "but it would be best to see for yourself. I know it sounds strange, but some things, some experiences simply cannot be explained from one person to the next…"

Inuyasha raised a brow, then immediately lowered both with a "Tch."

"…EXCEPT by the instruction manual," the man finished, also handing him a small thin folded piece of paper. "Will that be all for you today?"

"Sure, I guess," the white-haired one said with an idle headscratch, " he turned, then looked left and right. "Kagome? Kagome where'd you go?!" Finally he found her crouching near to crawling on the floor by the items the shop owner had mentioned, among others. "Aw, what're you doing?"

Kagome turned with a glower and a rare faint pout, "Hey! You got something so I wanna get something, okay?" She lifted up several things in turn, mumbling to herself. "…this one…or maybe this one…this one? Ooh, this one looks like it'd tickle so much…!"

He sighed with a shake of his head. Quietly he snuck up behind her in a crouch, giving her sides a strategic squeeze, making her jump and squeak. Getting to his feet, he said "You've already GOT something — it's called me!" When she stood up to face him, he raised a hand, wiggling clawed fingers, his lids drooped though he smiled broadly.

"Yeah, I guess you're right…but still…" She let her voice fade as they approached the counter. She zealously clutched a few of the small gemstones the man had mentioned earlier. "I'm getting these."

"Okay, one magic rosary…" Nahanom thought aloud as he began typing on the register. "…aaaand two small magic gemstones…that will BE… ¥5896."

"That's a little more than we wanted to spend," the girl noted, then shot her boyfriend a quick smirk. "But it's definitely worth it."

Both of them had practically raced back to the apartment, though Inuyasha won by default since he easily sprang over the _genkan_ while Kagome paused to slip off her shoes. They stood facing one another back in the living room while the girl unfolded the manual, eyes darting. It was more diagrams than text, though there was a numbered list.

The white-haired one actually bounced a little despite himself. "C'mon, C'MON! I wanna try it! Hurry up!"

"Okay, okay! Let's see Step One…well, put it on, of course —" she pulled the beads out of the shopping bag and handed them to Inuyasha who slipped them on with ease.

Holding it between forefinger and thumb, he mused "Feels kinda weird — but if it works, who the hell cares?! …Okay, what's next?"

"Calm down, jeez!" Kagome said though smirked. "Step Two: Hold the eighth mala to the right of the left magatama…" Walking up, she plucked it up as he had, gaze sliding back to the instructions. "…and say this spell to start the enchantment…you should see a flash…if you don't, see Diagram 9 — okay, here goes! …Aed Stringe Gyp Pith Tun!"

Both fixed their gazes on the rosary, anxiously. After a few seconds, they glowed a neon-bright pink which faded after another few seconds. The white-haired one clutched his hand in a fist, yanking his arm down and back with a "YES! Okay, now what? Now what? Do they work now?"

"Lemme see…uh, Step Three, Diagram 14…huh…  
"What? What is it?!"

"Well, I guess it says 'Hold the tenth bead to the left of the right magatama and say the word or phrase to invoke the enchantment. Speak loudly and clearly...should glow solidly when done…for multiple invoker use, see Diagram 22…"

"WHAT word?"

"I dunno!" the girl said, with a half palm-up shrug "I guess we get to pick…" then mused, "It's kind of like the opposite of a safe word," as she glanced over the manual again.

"Well, I dunno!" Inuyasha echoed, "Just say 'pocky' or 'backpack' or something and let's go! I've been waiting ALL DAY!" and threw up his arms, his eyes following. "Jeez, you probably got off two or three times on the way back with those other stupid things! I haven't been able to get anything in a WEEK!"

"Don't start yelling at me!" Kagome flung back, harnessing her onscreen persona a touch, complete with accusatory pointed finger, jabbing him in the chest. "YOU wanted to go down there so we did and I paid almost ¥6000 for this thing!"

The white-haired one only offered a rather genuine snarl in return.

With a subtle glower, the girl added "Well, since you're part dog I could say something ridiculous like 'Sit down, boy!" or… 'Siddownboy'…

And then then they lit up, as technically described. Inuyasha grabbed it again, saying "Crud! What'd you do? Did you just make that the actual word?! What the hell?"

"Shoot!" Kagome said, wincing, hands to her head as she shook it, "Aah, that's not what I wanted...!"

"Well, fix it!, then"

"I'm trying!" the girl said, lowering her arms and the sheet of paper. "Lemme check the manual — no! I'm not seeing anything! …Diagram 3…Diagram 7…"

"Check the back!"

"It's just the same instructions in Spanish!"

"You took a few years of that, you can read it, right?"

" _Primer paso, póngase el rosario_!"

The white-haired one let out a small roar and outright punched the nearest wall. "DAMMNIT!"

"HEY! Don't start wrecking stuff just because it didn't work the first time!" Kagome snapped. "And I almost forgot — Ms. Takahashi's coming for a visit at two o' clock. So DEFINITELY don't ruin anything. This manga could mean a lot for us — especially if it winds up to a TV show."

"Really? She's coming here? Why?" Inuyasha asked curtly, brow raised.

"Well, probably the same reason anybody else comes to visit this district… Besides, it'll definitely be less nerve-wrecking if we talk here than in some office. AND not to MENTION, I'd love to show off the apartment! …lotta cleaning before that though…"

"Okay, you do that! I'm gonna go take a nap. And maybe call Shippou and see if he still has those stupid monkeys' number."

"OHH, no you're not!" the black-haired girl said, turning with brows lowered. Pointing, as was her habit, she continued "You're gonna help me down to every last speck — and then I'll consider us even for getting you THAT thing…if you wanna keep being a jerk, you owe me double!"

"What?! Now you're just being stupid!"

Kagome took a step forward, mouth open — but was cutoff by the phone ringing. Picking it up she said "Hello? OH gosh, Ms. Takahashi! I didn't realize you were here already — I didn't even realize it was later than I thought!" glancing at the clock, she twitched and lightly facepalmed, dragging her hand down and sighing. "Oh, no, yeah, you can come right in, I'll unlock the door for you…yeah, just a few last little kinda unexpected things to tidy up, but other than that, we're all set! …okay…okay great, see you in a few minutes!"

The moment she set the phone back down, her eyes went wide, and Inuyasha watched — and felt, his hair and clothes ruffling — as she fleeped into action, 'toonishly leaving everything sparkling in her wake. Even the things that logically wouldn't sparkle, like the couch and cushions.

Finally, she slowed down, walking wearily over to the back of the nearer couch, leaning on it, burying her head in her arms; still breathing hard, sweat visible on her neck.

"Whoa, why didn't you just do that before?" the white-haired one asked incredulously. Walking up beside her, lids drooped brows convex, he faintly simpered and put a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, look, I —"

"Don't touch me right now!" she exclaimed loudly, tugging her arm up and away from his hand.

"Well, jeez! I was just trying to be nice for once!" His brows lowered again.

"I know, but…just leave me alone right now!"

"Yeah, but what about Ms. Takahashi? Isn't she on her way up?"

"I know that! Just go away for a minute, okay? I need some time to decompress!"

Blinking a bit blankly, then resuming his glare, he went on "What the hell is wrong with you?! First you want me to help you so bad you'll kick my ass if I don't — and now you just go and do everything and won't let ME do a damn thing? Make up your mind!"

Pushing herself back to a stand, she cringed, blurting out the only thing that would assure distance between them at the moment. "Just… SIDDOWNBOY, OKAY!"

The beads lit up again brightly, now accompanied by a sort of hauntingly shrill sound, and half-yanked, half-slammed Inuyasha into the floor — also in a 'toonish blur — and ended with a white flash and a strange sort of smacking sound.

Opening one eye, then the other, blinking, she looked down with convex brows. "Wow, I can't believe it worked…"

"What was that just now?" asked a third voice, a woman's voice, coming closer. "It was a bit strange, but I think it's funny!"

Trembling already, a generously large 'toonish sweatdrop adding to her present sweat, Kagome turned. Very slowly. Then finished her pivot quicker and bowed to her soon-to-be-employer. "Welcome to our home, Ms. Takahashi! I hope you like it…"

"It's very nice, and so nicely freshly cleaned. Better than mine," the human woman said.

"Oh, I'm sure that's not true at all!" the 'toon girl added.

"Thank you," Takahashi said. "And I'm sorry to so rude, but please tell me, what happened just now? You said something and it knocked him to the floor?"

"Uh…well, yeah, I guess so…" she squeaked out breathily, eyes darting. "It's, uh…it's for…well…uh…u-uh…"

Inuyasha looked as if he were in no hurry to pick himself up off the floor. He'd yelped and grunted when she casually activated the strange juju beads. Now he was almost unusually quiet.

"Inuyasha? Inuyasha! …INUYASHA! GET UP, WE HAVE A GUEST!"

Finally, he lifted his head, leaning on his elbows with a teeth-clenched growl of "I CAN'T."

"What? Of course you can! Get up here and help me out! What's the matter?"

Saying nothing more for the moment, the white-haired one looked up, then down in an uneven nod, as if he were trying to point with his chin. Gaze following his direction, Kagome indeed saw the problem, twitching with a very briefly frightened face. Grabbing the largest pillow she could from where she stood, she threw it to him. Whereupon he slowly picked himself up, trying to hold the thing casually but still strategically. His fire rat robe was thankfully baggy and roomy enough as such. That wasn't the issue as much as the fact that they were quite soaked, matching the circumference on the floor.

"Hi, Ms. Takahashi! It's…really…great you…wanted to come and see us!" Inuyasha fumbled, glancing back and forth, mostly at Kagome with wide 'What the hell else do you want me to say?' eyes. "W-We appreciate it."

"Very much!" the 'toon girl added with a slow, low bow.

"I can't tell you how much I appreciate you opening your home to me," the human woman went on. "I know humans aren't supposed to stay in this district that long — but it's so beautiful and colorful, I couldn't resist!"

The pair nodded. Turning, Kagome said to Inuyasha "Uh, why don't you go…splash some water on your face — or…maybe actually just shower?"

"O-Okay, sure," he acknowledged, matching her volume. Giving the pillow a 'toonishly accurate toss dry-side up over the mess on the floor, he sidled past the black-haired girl and made a dash for the bathroom.

"Anyway…would you like some tea?" the 'toon girl asked. "I just made it a few hours ago, so it's very fresh."

"Thank you so much, Kagome, but no," Takahashi said, smiling. As the pair sat down across from each other at the kitchen table, she went on "Now, I wanted to talk specifically about the manga and your opinion on the story and any objections you might have. I'll let the team at Shogakukan know about what we discussed. But mainly, I want to make sure that you and Inuyasha are comfortable with it and what the two of you would get out of it." She paused with a simper. "I've always loved working with 'toons, you know, but as a human, I could never assume to know what they might feel or need."

The 'toon girl blinked, then briefly closed her eyes and shook her head despite a smile; bowing it, she opened them. "Please don't worry, Ms. Takahashi — we're both very happy and grateful that you've chosen us to help share this story. I like it very much, and I know Inuyasha does, too. I think it's very clever and funny and I know a lot of people will like it besides us. Humans and 'toons alike, I think — though, as a 'toon, I could never say for sure."

Catching the gleam of a smirk in her eyes, the human woman mirrored it for just a moment. With a slow nod, she added with a glance toward the family room. "And the bit with the magic necklace? Will you mind if I use that? Will Inuyasha mind?"

Kagome twitched ever so noticeably, but then relaxed, and nodded again several times. "Mm, of course!" she replied. "I know he'll be fine with it — in fact, I think he'll like it…"

"Really? Well, that's wonderful!"

"Mmhm!"

After much actual discussion of plot points and shoot times and some pay negotiation, Rumiko gathered up her notes and left, the two women — despite their current familiarity and the more casual setting — sharing a rather deep bow of respect before the girl closed the door quietly behind her.

Peeking in the bedroom, she saw her boyfriend asleep on his side of their bed, a few visible water drops still on his cheek, clad in a clean nu-bakama. And for the first time in a long time, he looked almost uncharacteristically peaceful.

She watched him for another minute or so, slowly smiling and finally walking toward the bed. With another bit of a smirk, she reached down to deftly trace and scritch a finger along his closest-lying sole.

He twitched with a mildly grinning flinch, curling further with a mutter of "Aaah…that's your thing, that's not my thing…!"

Kagome snickered as she sat down on her side of the bed, lightly rolling over the edge onto it in a nearly catlike flop, and soon a sly smile to match. "Hey, we're a couple — we share things." She angled herself to aim a light purse-lipped breath at his ear, making it twitch several times as he shivered.

Opening his eyes from another silly-looking flinch, he stared out blankly for a moment "Really?" glancing down at the beads again, before his lids drooped above a broad grin. "You're awesome."

She idly brushed a finger along them across his chest, lids lowered likewise. "Thanks." Another pause. "So…"

The white-haired one rolled onto his back, hands cradling his head. "Y'know, I was just thinking —…I mean, not like I haven't already told you a thousand times…I dunno…"

"Don't worry about it," she added, "I mean, I've told you things a thousand and one times too, right?" She slid down onto her back as well, following his gaze to their ceiling. "Like when I always think about that time in elementary school where a bunch of kids cornered me and tickled me senseless…and by the time my mom picked me up I was still crying but…by the next day I was really hoping they'd do it again?" She sighed. "…and they didn't."

"Well, okay…" Inuyasha said quietly, looking at her, giving his ear a humanlike scratch. "That thing just worked so good, I…I remembered that time when I was a kid…" His eyes hazed, wandering away, and then sticking back to the ceiling. "It was right after I figured stuff out, and I — I feel bad…I went over to the couch where my mom'd usually sit and…I crawled under the cushion. Tried to stay real flat and real still, y'know… I just remember when she came and sat down and just…how awesome it felt. I mean, I was still a kid but…like…even back then…it felt better than anything I could even explain. Even now." Finally, he paused, eyes closed with a lightly simpering snort. "I still remember how she freaked out — she gets up and sees me and just yanks me up into her arms, rocking me and petting me and crying and babbling 'Oh my gosh, I didn't even see you there! I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, my poor baby!' and I kept telling her 'Mom! Mom! It's okay! No, really, it's okay!' …but yeah…couldn't ever do THAT again. Tch. Then how I tried breaking Sesshomaru's stuff on purpose — 'coz he used to beat me up every now and then pretty good. …Just something about that first hit, when your skin feels totally numb but then it gets all tight and tingly and hot, and all the blood's rushing to your face…" He rubbed his cheek rather wistfully. "But he caught on quick, too. …I remember when I first told Miroku that he just laughed his head off 'coz he said he did the same thing! …then after his dad dies his Mom starts dating that really abusive guy and THEN it was easy. Lucky jerk."

Kagome tittered. "Well…I'm just glad it turned out that way and that jerk didn't end up hurting anybody else like that before he got what he deserved." She eyed the wall closer to her with a blink. "Is he still around?"

"I dunno. Miroku says he's tried to track the guy down but apparently he kinda disappeared after he got out of prison the last time. Meh…"

"I'll never forget the first time Sango and I talked about tickling," the girl said, hands to her cheeks with a happy wiggle. "I found a soul sister for life! …She was telling me about how she never really thought she was all that ticklish except for when Kilala and Kulolo would crawl all over her and knead and everything. She tried getting them to lick her more, but they never seemed interested. Even Kohaku — it broke her heart! She fell head over heels for Miroku on like their second date only because he started tickling her." The black-haired girl shot her boyfriend a look. "I remember telling her it took you FIVE dates to start doing that…"

"Hey, excuse the heck outta me for being slow to the punch — or…whatever…" He made a small grin as he reached out to playfully pinch her side several times.

"Eeeeeeeeeeee! Well, at leheast you try!"

He withdrew. "Well, gee, thanks!"

She pushed herself up on her elbow, looking rather typically seductive. "So…now that we don't have guests to worry about, ready for a round two?"

In a literal blink, she saw him standing on the floor at the foot of the bed. "Yes. YES. HOLY CRAP, YES!"

Pushing herself to a full sit and sweeping out a commandingly rigid arm with finger pointed, she raised her voice, invoking "SIDDOWNBOY!"

With a loud grunt, Inuyasha was back on the floor in another, blurrier, flashier blink. His was face practically buried in the thin carpet, though he raised his head with a small sighing groan, saying "Okay, you're gonna hafta do that a few more times now..."

She obliged. "Siddownboy!"

""HNNG… again, please!"

"Siddownboy!"

"NnnnNNGH…one more!"

Kagome took a deeper breath, raising her volume again. "SIDDOWNBOY!"

Finally, after the last fwam, Inuyasha was mostly silent — save for what could only be described as a pleasantly choking hitched breath. Face about as red as his robe, he let out a fatigued-sounding sigh, smiling even broader.

Mirroring it, the black-haired girl slipped off the bed, walking over to him and yanking him up by the back of the beads "What is that? What is that?!" and pressing his face into the second rug stain. "Bad dog! BAD DOG!"

Beyond another muffled grunt, her boyfriend looked coyly at her with a wheezy self-depreciating chuckle.

"Aah…I just realized I really AM gonna have to clean this rug twice as much now!" the girl thought aloud. "…but I'm glad you really did, er, get a lot out of this."

"More than I can ever thank you for," he admitted. "But, hey, if we really are gonna start showing up and sticking this Takahashi lady's 'Feudal Fairy Tale' in the back of some weekly comic book, then I won't be making that much on this rug. Don't worry!"

And as the ladies had predicted, apparently the so-called 'sacred rosary' was a hit with manga fans — especially the ladies.

It had been harder to work with between shots from Rumiko's '96 Sony DSC-F1 — though occasionally she took additional shots with her beloved old '62 Asahiflex that her father had given her for her birthday. He and her mother had still seemed a bit shocked fourteen years later when she asked for the equivalent of roughly $600 to attend school at Kazuo Koike's Cartoon Studies school. They certainly showed an acceptable amount of pride when she graduated at the top of her class, and came away with no less than three highly-awarded publications and two years later a serial adaptation of the third in the big name Weekly Shonen Sunday.

One ritual Japanese graphic novelists practiced was giving their 'toons a potion they called by the very English word 'blend' — which would tweak a 'toon's breed to match the typical stylized manga sets. Most 'toonizing potions/'breed changers' had to be heavily sweetly flavored to be palatable. Somehow 'burendo' still managed to taste like "a combination of dirty dishwater, laundry water, and bath water boiled with green peppers."

Inuyasha gulped it down faithfully each time, though — and only Kagome hid a smile while the crew and their fellow cast members looked on with slightly admirable disgust.

This changed in late 2000, however, when the manga's popularity attracted the attention of Sunrise Studios and the Animax Network who eagerly geared up to premiere Inuyasha the TV show from the lenses of professional filming cameras.

The broken bridge had been an honest accident — naturally there had been some reshoots for the pilot episode; some, Kagome swore, due to intentional sabotage. Though, with it, once again the fans were thrilled, Takahashi and co. were thrilled, all were amused, and the beads' true nature was diverted from.

Then came Episode Five.

"Tend to my wounds? Forget it!"

"It's a serious injury! Get down and lemme help you!"

"No way, get lost!"

"I said come down!"

"Hmph!"

"Siddownboy!"

"HNNWOAA! …nn…nnn…nngh, you — what the hell d'you think you're doing?"

"Trying to help you heal up! You've been thrown around and cut up and beat up and mangled —!"

"Get one thing straight! I WON, okay! Did you forget that already?!"

"Take that shirt off!"

"Get off me!"

"Just take 'em off for a minute!"

On cue, 'Lady Kaede' whirled around, bidding "Don't look, children!" to exactly three peppy naïve 'toon child actors. Who proceeded to make a somewhat unscripted charge for the girl.

"That Kagome girl is gonna hurt Inuyasha, too!"

"Let's get her!"

"Yeah! Leave him alone!"

After a turn and a brief cry of "Huuh?!" the black-haired girl was tackled to the ground and thoroughly tickled by the youngsters uttering adorable little war cries and scattered taunts of 'Cootchie coo!"

The white-haired one looked on with a 'toonishly unimpressed face, his even tinier nose twitching with a pronounced snort. "I didn't need rescuing, you little brats…" As his girlfriend lay there now breathily heavily, eyes wide, jaw slack, limbs sprawled, he slowly rose. "...and I DON'T need your help! In case you haven't noticed, my body's different! See?" He clutched the inward edge of his shirts with his right hand, letting the left side slide off his shoulder, revealing more fangirl fodder. And also an immaculately uninjured pectoral.

With a finger at her chin and a gasp, Kagome uttered a wide-eyed, quiet "It's gone! He did heal up already…"

Director Masashi and Takahashi leaned in to finish a personal discussion quietly just off-set. Then the man bid "Cut!"

"Huh? What was wrong with that?" Inuyasha griped.

"Awww!" the kids chorused.

The old woman took the opportunity to grab and sip her coffee, watching as Rumiko stepped forward.

"We're going to have to redo that scene, I'm sorry," she offered. A glance at Ikeda prompted a short firm nod from him.

"WHAT?!" the white-haired one echoed. "WHY?"

"Well, we don't think we should keep the scene of Kagome being tickled like that here."

In roughly the exact same manner, now the girl piped up. "WHAT?! WHY?"

The humans exchanged another glance for a longer moment. "Well, it's just not the kind of thing we're looking for right now," the director offered. In any other language and society, it would've been taken as cryptic.

"Plus, some people might see it as…not something for a comedy anime, the way you were staring at her like that," Takahashi said. "And we just started this series, we don't want anyone to take issue with it this soon!"

Now the black-haired girl sat, looking off with a pout and arms folded, not unlike the kids. "That's — …it's just —…!" she stammered quietly, then uttered a frustrated noise with a shrug-punctuated huff.

"Besides," Rumiko said as she turned to walk back to her chair, "We don't want anything overly sexual in a show like this…"

Kagome watched her — and by the time she lowered her head, looking over at her boyfriend, he had on the widest, most slyly knowing grin imaginable. And then some. Gritting her teeth though not baring them, she growled "Shut up!"

"I didn't say anything!" was his reflexive reply. "But…hey, you're welcome. I tried."

She glanced at him, relaxing her shoulders finally. "Your idea?"

"Yep. Kids totally loved it, though."

The black-haired 'toon girl looked over at them again, but by now they stood around Kaede asking her questions and eagerly nomming on the refreshments she'd ferried over, while the humans adjusted their cameras.

"I bet they did…so did I."

"I noticed!"

"Well, it was worth a shot…"

"No problem." He closed his eyes a moment, snorting. "It's total crap, though — I mean, considering 'the way I was staring at you' completely naked in Episode 2 and this is going on TV in the middle of the night. Just not their thing."

"Guess so…"

"It was pretty hot, though."

"Well, gee, thanks!" Kagome quipped, though she smiled.

For a moment, with everyone and every'toon else still occupied, they shared a tiny short kiss — one that fans wouldn't even get a whiff of for nearly a decade.

The scene was reshot with a gag along the lines of 'If only Inuyasha and Kagome could get along more…' 'Look, they're getting along just fine!' though the old woman's 'Avert your eyes!' line and initial reaction was kept.

Normally, post-credits scenes existed to add in a last-minute callback gag or further hype audiences for future installments of superhero team-up movies. In 2003, after the events of Swords of an Honorable Ruler, it was done for a very element-specific purpose. The independence of the Inuyasha show-'verse and the Inuyasha movie-'verse was known by the writers and presumed by fans — but director Shinohara and screenplay writer Sumiwara had come up with an idea to join them and eliminate any plot discrepancies. A very terrible, horrible, unthinkable idea.

Re-re-re-reading the last few pages of Swords, and double-triple-checking his copy of the Episode 53 and 54 scripts, he brandished them with a blurt of "Heyheyhey, wait! So…what's this about the necklace being gone? Just because of what happened in the movie?"

"Well, YES, exactly," Season Two director Aoki chimed. "You see, we feel that you and Kagome have come to truly trust each other at this point, and while the beads being broken was an accident, it's going to be a turning point for your relationship as whole…"

The 'toons looked on a bit blankly, blinking, and sharing a glance before returning their gaze to the man.

"…so from now on, things will be a bit more serious. Mostly — of course there'll still be some comedy. But Kagome won't have any reason to use the rosary, so we're getting rid of it." He looked the white-haired one in the eyes. "Won't that be a bit of a relief?"

Inuyasha's lips twitched before his voice came through them again. "Well, SURE, but — I mean…" His brows were convex.

Now the humans sitting in front of them mirrored their confused look with a glance or two among themselves. Once again also present, Takahashi raised a brow. There was a very heavy long silence.

Kagome looked at him, though said nothing, straightening herself in her chair. Facing Yasunao, she reiterated "You…were saying that…so basically we let the rosary stay broken and done with because I trust him to stay with me? Right?"

Aoki nodded again. And the white-haired one scoffed.

Once again, Inuyasha looked thoroughly unimpressed, flinging up an arm. "Oh, like THAT'D ever happen!"

"Wellll, it COULD, y'know…" his girlfriend said with a small fidget. "I mean —"

"Well, what about all the drama with Kikyou still? Why not just write HER out now, too, huh?!"

"Right, but, listen —"

"But – But it's a LOOK!" the white-haired one nigh-on barked. "It's all Feudal Era and stuff! It's totally part of WHO I AM now!" He lightly tugged on them; then indeed locked eyes with the new director. "I mean, why don't you just get rid of Kenshin's scar? O-Or Ranma's braid? Or that Mifune idiot's stupid ascot?"

Another silence.

"Hmm…" the black-haired girl uttered, sitting back with arms folded, eyes closed, head down — then raised it. "Y'know? You're right! You're TOTALLY right! It'd be ridiculous to get rid of it now, and the fans'd be upset too…" She eyed the now rather surprised humans, turning to her boyfriend. "But wait, what the heck am I supposed to do? Just pull 'em outta nowhere and say 'Here, put these back on just because'? …The fandom would hate me!"

Raising a finger, face 'toonishly wide and round as he blinked innocent-looking eyes. "But…doesn't…most of the fandom hate you already?"

Making another series of roundish, exaggerated 'toonish faces from shock to narrow-eyed incredulity to sheer anger with a visible vein to boot, she howled "SIDDOWNBOY!" and naturally sent Inuyasha crashing to the floor. The whole room shook — though, like most highly frequented buildings in Tokyo, Sunrise's headquarters was built to withstand a Shindo number of at least 6-upper.

And with that, the humans shared a laugh. Nod-nodding, Aoki admitted "All right, all right, we'll keep the rosary. In fact, I think I've just had another idea of how to use it."

"Me too," Rumiko noted — literally pulling out a small notebook to scribble an idea in.

From the floor, Inuyasha muttered "You're darn right you did."

Kagome only snorted, though she smirked once again.

So in a scene seen shortly after Namie Amuro's 'Four Seasons' song, Kagome and Inuyasha lay in a bed of field mustards. After a brief discussion about Sesshomaru and Rin, the girl sprang to a sit.

"Oh, yeah, hey! Inuyasha, sit up for a minute!"

"What? Whaddayou want?"

"I've got something nice for you…"

"Jeez, what a pain. Okay, FINE."

"Okay, close your eyes, please!"

"Tch."

"Okay, open 'em!"

"Huh? EH WHAA?! Not the stupid enchanted beads! You said it was gonna be something nice!"

"Whaaaat? You thought it was something dirty, didn't you?"

"The heck?! Like what?"

"Ha, I knew it."

"I don't need this! Don't you trust me or what?"

"Sure I do — but I still don't want you running off."

"Okay so I won't! Take 'em off! TAKE 'EM OFF!"

"No way."

As the white-haired one flopped down onto his back from his writhing and tugging, Shinohara called "Cut!"

Inuyasha paused, looking up, legs still in the air. His girlfriend looked back with a smile.

"That was perfect! Great job!"

"Thanks, Mr. Shinohara!" the black-haired girl bid for the both of them. As the humans went back to a bout of technical adjustments, she leaned toward her boyfriend and bid a quiet "Hey, you're welcome. I tried my best."

"This is why you're awesome!" he hissed back. Finally popping up to a sit, he glanced down, tapping the beads with his claws before, turning. "Hey, you wanna try 'em? You should totally try 'em, c'mon!"

"Ah…uhhh…that's your thing, that's not my thing," she said, flat palms waving. "Mmmaybe later."

"No, like right now! We're a couple — we share things. …Right?"

"Well…"

"Of course I'm right!"

Kagome heard the clacks unusually close as he slipped them over her head, letting her shoulders take their weight. With a small sigh, she looked down, running her fingers over them. They were rather beautiful-looking shiny beads, and despite Inuyasha's gushing, she had wondered about the personal feel of their effects more than once.

Now the white-haired one smiled beneath convex brows, lightly clapping his hands together. "Okayokayokay…tell me when you're ready."

She looked at him, into his big shiny eyes, looking even yellower with all the flowers around them. "I trust you," she said, closing hers. "Okay, I'm ready."

"Hehehe…SIDDOWNBOY!"

With a very short shriek, she felt the magic's strange grasp, flipping her around as if caught in a giant invisible oceanlike wave of air and flinging her into a blurry bellyflop in the flowers. She grunted; segueing into a groan as she picked herself up, sitting there on all fours a bit dazed but not too unpleasantly so.

"So? Whaddaya think? Whaddaya think?" her boyfriend chirped leaning forward. After a moment, he started chuckling steadily, seeing her nose wedged full of flower petals. It twitched several times before she shook with a quiet sneeze.

Finally, she rose to a kneel, sniffling, then beaming with a small grin as she lightly brushed some more petals and leaves out and off of her collar. "That…actually wasn't bad," she professed, slowly opening her eyes halfway. "It tickled enough."

"You are SUCH a weirdo."

"So're you."

One of the many cameras had been pre-positioned low to the ground for a closer-up establishing shot of the flowers. Tacking on a clip that had caught the unscripted shockwave to the final project, with surprisingly little ADR from both of them, moviegoers and Inuyasha fans at large were none the wiser.

And the beads saw many more a use since then.

 **THE END**


End file.
